Huh.

[indiana_j]

I could have sworn I cross posted this to my journal but apparently I didn't. Here was the story I wrote for apocalyptothon and, honestly, I think this was some of my best stuff in ages.

[Unknown site tag]

Title: The Great Burn
Author: indiana_j
Fandom: Firefly
Rating: PG
Pairing: None
Warnings: None
Recipient: netgirl_y2k
Request:  The people who were left behind on Earth That Was
Summary: When the end of the world is near, do you decide to walk among the stars or do you stay behind?

AN:  Many, many, many thanks to aliciam and aura_wolf who both came in and saved my bacon with the beta reads.

"Little by little, the tribes used the Earth up. Barren, she had little left to offer them. Swollen of her, they left. And for the first time since the Great Burn that birthed her, she was alone. The Earth cried, and terrible were her tears. Acid and caustic, the spawn of the tribes' rape. They flowed a century. The fire that finally came did so as a blessing." ~ Quote from "Heart of Gold”

~~

“Joan.”

There was a hand on her shoulder, shaking her awake. Joan murmured something, eyes opening slowly in the expectation of light of some kind but there was only darkness. Instead, she found her husband crouched next to the bed, face tight in the play of the shadows. “Tony? What is it? Is it the baby?”

Tony shook his head, trailing his hand from her shoulder to her hand, an almost-caress that woke her up more than the shaking earlier. “Johnny's fine,” he reassured, “but you need to get up, sweetheart. We need to go.”

“Go? Go where?” Confused and starting to get frightened, Joan sat up, hugging the blankets to herself. “Tony, tell me what's going on. It's not even...” A glance over her shoulder told her that it wasn't even four in the morning yet. She'd only been asleep for about five hours—it had been Tony's turn to watch the baby.

A flash of light from outside illuminated the room and she flinched away from the window. “Oh god, oh god, oh god,” she breathed, head turning back to stare at Tony. “It's the war, isn't it? We've lost...?”

He barked out a harsh laugh and reached up to rub his face. She could hear the rasping sound of his fingers rubbing against the start of a beard. “No, we've all lost. Now come on, they're evacuating.”

“Where?”

A hand reached over and grabbed hers, the cool metal of his wedding ring rubbing against the skin of her hand. “Into space, they're sending people up in the spacecraft. This is it, this is the end.”

~~

Dressed now, Joan hurried from their bedroom and into the nursery. She touched the wood of the door as she passed, remembering the fight they'd had ended up in months before. They had originally planned to keep the baby in their room with them, but he'd insisted upon a nursery—and in the end, she was glad. Painting and decorating the room had given her something to do during the pregnancy; it had kept her busy while war raged all around them.

She stopped by the crib and stared down, blinking back tears. They were in a Safe Zone and nowhere near the land currently being fought over by the governments of the world. Shivering, she thought about Alaska. Despite the overpopulation that had started to cripple the rest of the planet, for a long time it had gone untouched, still pristine in its natural condition.

Until someone had decided that the Earth was damned anyway and by utilizing the resources that Alaska presented, they could guarantee enough resources for a little while longer. Enough resources for whomever got their hands on it first and for those that had the money, that was.

And, so, war. At first, the age old alliances had stuck together, East versus West, but eventually it had broken down completely. Now it was everyone for themselves and it looked like it had finally caught up with them.

Reaching down, Joan scooped up Johnny, cradling him close to her. He grunted and squirmed, unhappy with being woken up, but she just sang softly to him until he fell back asleep. A shadow fell on them and she flinched, relaxing when she saw Tony standing in the doorway.

“Just me, sweetheart.” Walking over, he dropped the bag in his hand on the floor before gathering Joan and the baby in his arms. She didn't comment on the fact that he was shaking enough for her to feel; she simply pressed against him as Johnny cooed at his parents. “I tossed in a few things for us, but the rest of the bag should be whatever we need for him,” Tony said softly, lips pressed against her hairline.

She took a deep breath, one after another, in an attempt to fight down a wave of panic. A selfish thought crept through her mind—they'd scrounged together to buy the apartment and furnish it when few others could afford to do so. To leave it all behind...

“All right, all right,” she murmured into her husband's shoulder.

It would be all right, in the end, because it had to be. If her thoughts strayed to what might happen, how it might not be all right, she would break into a thousand jagged pieces.

Every fairy tale has a happy ending, even small ones.

~~

Four hours after they had fled the apartment, the elevators in the building had died. The one that Joan had never liked, with it's creaking floors and outdated specs—it was a “classic” elevator, one that ran on older Earth technology—had broken free of the brakes and a panic ensued at the screams and crashes that followed. The other elevators simply remained stuck, trapping their inhabitants in metal tombs.

They'd been unable to get in one, despite having a baby, but they were numbly grateful as they fled with the rest down the stairwells that smelled more and more like urine and fear. The grip they had on each other was beyond painful as fingers left bruises, fingernails scratched and wedding rings froze the heated skin.

Johnny was stuffed tightly in the pouch Joan was wearing and she kept an arm looped around him much like she'd protected her wide stomach before he was born. He'd been fussing loudly while they waited for the elevators until another harried mother had shared some formula. She'd mixed in medicine to help the younger ones sleep through the ruckus—it was not something Joan and Tony had ever done before but in the end, they decided it was better to keep him quiet and asleep than frightened and crying.

Tony led the way, using his body to clear a path for his wife and son. He wasn't a big man but he was solid and desperate, a good combination. The last few stairs passed under their feet in a blur, Joan nearly stumbling in their haste, and then they were outside, the emergency door having been ripped off its hinges hours before.

With a curse, he dodged to the side to avoid running into the crush of humanity on the street. With Joan pressed against him, there was less chance of losing each other but everyone was running for their lives. The crowd moved and strained in the same direction, at least, and the only choices they had were to either move with the flow or be crushed to death.

“Oh my God,” Joan moaned, pressing so close that she could feel him breathing deeply, “look behind us...just look...”

Not wanting to but unable to stop himself, Tony shot a quick glance over his shoulder. What he saw almost made him give up on the spot and the only thing that made him turn around and keep going was the sight of his wife cradling their baby to her chest.

The Safe Zone they were in had been built in the remains of a city whose name had been forgotten; it was big, empty and, more importantly, had the ability to be guarded and protected. When it was first occupied, the people in charge had built a fence around the perimeter. The excuse had been that it kept the enemy out, but it also kept everyone in. Back then, people had tried to leave, to go underground or to attempt to find isolated patches of wilderness that hadn't been touched yet.

No one tried now but in certain areas of the zone, if the haze and fog lifted, they could just catch glimpses of the fence in the distance. Beyond that was barren land but it was still a sight to be treasured since, after all, it was different from the every day sights of the city suffocating underneath its own weight.

But as Tony forced himself to focus on the weight of Joan's hand in his and the pattern of the shirt on the man in front of him, he couldn't keep out the image of nothing in his head.

Because that's what he'd seen when he looked back—nothing. Beyond the last few tall towers of the city, no fence stood and there was no bleak, No Man's Land mocking them all. Just a cloud of dust, the fall out from the bombs, slowly creeping toward the city proper.

Ahead of them lay their salvation. There was no real sky to provide a dramatic back-drop and the spaceships didn't gleam with silver...they were tarnished from the pollution and hidden neatly among the shape of the city. But it didn't matter, none of it mattered.

All that mattered was that they worked and that they got on them.

~~

Ten blocks out and it was going to take over an hour to reach the 'registration booth', whatever the hell that was. Joan coughed and spat, trying to clear her mouth of the dust that seemed to be settling over everything, before shuffling forward in the rough line that had formed.

“Even now, at the end of the world, there still lies red tape,” someone muttered and the small group around gave a bitter, tired laugh.

She kept a sharp eye on Tony's back as he tried to coax some information out of a young soldier who stood guard on the side of the road.

In reality, he was probably a young man, either with no family or separated from them, forced to carry a gun and to follow the orders from a slightly older, only slightly less frightened man. He bore the insignia of the Alliance but beyond that and the gun, he had nothing else to use to keep the crowd at bay if they started to get rowdy.

And both he and they knew it would not be enough.

With a soft sigh, Joan finished feeding Johnny before sliding him back into the front pouch. He fussed quietly, sneezing slightly and she started when a white handkerchief appeared in front of her eyes.

“Use it to cover his head. Go on, take it.”

Craning her neck back, she stared up at the man standing in front of her and her arms clutched convulsively at her baby. When he made no sudden moves, she relaxed enough to accept what he was offering and did as he suggested, tucking the sides down so that he could breath but still be safely covered.

“Thank you...oh, thank you, Father.”

The priest gave her a slightly vacant smile. “You're welcome, my child. May you and the child see the stars once more before you go to greet our Maker.”

Before she could respond, he started to move past her and she reached out to grab at his sleeve. “You're going the wrong way!” Joan protested and frowned when he gently removed her hand.

“No, my dear, I am going the right way. My way is not forward or backward but it is here and now. Remember that when the time comes.” He leaned over and whispered, “Run, child. Take your family and run. There is no time and when He comes to take us to the stars, he will not pick and choose but He will take all he can.”

“I...”

“Run.”

And so she scrambled to her feet and pushed through the crowd to grab at the surprised Tony. The words of the crazy priest weighed down on her and she started to part the crowd with a strength she didn't know she had.

There was no time. They had to run.

~~

There was no way to describe the insanity near the spaceships. People screamed and pushed against each other, leaving behind the young and the old in their frenzy to reach supposed safety. An old chain link fence barely kept them at bay and forced people to go through hastily set up check points, at which more guards were stationed.

Joan and Tony found themselves in what would have been called a cattle chute at one point, pressed forward by the people behind them and the sense of nothingness that nipped at their heels. A guard stood just a few feet away and shouted out orders at an alarming rate.

Unlike the poor boy in the streets, this man radiated the control and authority that was needed. People listened to him, even in their panic, and the line was inching towards a ramp in the background. It was strange and unfamiliar, this ramp that led into a dark corridor, but it was better than the alternative.

But when Joan reached the front, things changed.

“You, you can go in,” the soldier said, pointing at her as another man moved up to grab a door and a lock. “But the man, he has to stay. We're only taking women and children now, we're running out of room.”

Something dropped as she twisted around to grab at Tony. “No! No, he has to come. You have to have room, he's just one more person!”

Tony was looking from her, to the baby, to the ship and back again with a curious detached look as she wound her hands in his shirt. Despite the drugged formula, the baby felt her panic and started to cry loudly.

Another man, the other soldier, was tugging on Tony's arm and she was clinging to the front of him. “God, please, no, don't do this to us!” She didn't care that she was screaming and hysterical or that she was riling up the crowd now being sorted as well. “Tony, tell them, please, tell them!”

He pressed a kiss into her hair and then onto Johnny's head before he yanked her hands off of him. “I love you both,” he whispered once and turned and ran towards a smaller entrance that was heavily guarded.

Arms wrapped around her biceps and she was being dragged towards the ship by the first guard and both she and her baby were wailing. There was a scuffle and then the sound of metal under her feet as she ended up on the ramp.

It was only when Joan went limp that the man let go and she found herself sitting on the ramp, sobbing. He knelt before her and gripped her face in his hands and she was only vaguely aware that he was talking to her. Not yelling but talking, soothing, trying to calm her down.

She stared, hard, through the tears and realized he was younger than she had thought and his eyes were a soft brown, like the baby that sat crying in her arms. She couldn't help but wonder where his family was and if they were safe inside or stuck on the outside, torn from him like she and Tony

“Family? Where's your family?” It was a whisper but it stopped him from talking.

“My wife's inside,” he told her, unable to hide the relief in his voice.

“Children?”

“No, no children.” Not yet lay unspoken and Joan knew because that's what she and Tony used to say in the beginning of their marriage, before she got pregnant.

Like when the priest had spoken to her earlier, Joan felt something horrible and terrible settle down on her and she scrambled to her feet. The young man stepped back, close but giving her space and he could only stare as she ripped the fastenings off the kangaroo pouch and shoved Johnny into his arms.

Reaching up, she grabbed the man by the back of the neck and leaned up, lips whispering against his ear, “Tell him I loved him, that I would have died for him. That he had a family once who loved him enough to give him to someone who could take care of him...”

“What? I can't...you need to get in...”

“Selfish, I know, but there's no life without Tony. I would die among the stars, slowly, and I know this. The stars would eat at me, consume who I am, and would leave no mother for my child. Please, please, please, I beg you. Love him like he was yours, tell him of the two families and of the hero who took him in.”

Like Tony, she pressed a kiss to Johnny's head and then one to the stranger that she felt she could trust before she dropped the knapsack next to his feet and turned and ran towards the fence.

The stars would consume her in her grief, but Johnny would find a new life out there with the survivors of Earth. He would come to know the blackness of space like his mother had known the Safe Zone—it would be his home, his prison, his life. But she couldn't follow.

For the first time, she understood what the priest had said to her. Her way was not forward or backwards but it was the here and now.

“Wait!”

Joan stopped and turned, perched on her tip toes to flee. The man cradled Johnny to his chest, his face bewildered.

“What's your name? And his, ma'am...please.”

“Joan and Tony. His is Johnny. And yours?” It wouldn't matter for very long, but it would soothe her while there was time left.

“Adam Reynolds.”

“Johnny Reynolds...yes, it suits him very much.”

And she turned and fled, finding her husband's horrified gaze in the crowd easily.

~~

Tony shoved her back against the fence as Joan came through, his grip tight and bruising. “Why?” he yelled, shaking her, sobbing in bewilderment. “You stupid, stupid woman! Why...?”

“He had your eyes,” Joan cried. “The man, Adam, he had your eyes and Johnny will be safe, he'll grow to be a good man. Save me from the stars, Tony, don't let them consume me...” She yanked him down, hands gripping his hair, as he kissed her. It wasn't gentle and there was anger and grief in there but they didn't stop.

Not when the ships lifted off the ground, shaking the ground and knocking people from their feet.

And not when the fallout overtook the survivors of Earth and the bombs followed, leaving only nothingness behind it.