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Oct. 14th, 2005 07:25 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
indiana_jTitle: Wax On, Wax Off
Fandom: Firefly
Characters: Wash, Kaylee, Mal, Zoe
Prompt: 003 - Ends
Word Count: 1,109
Rating: PG-13 for swearing explanations
Author's Notes: So...what ever happened to Wash's mustache?
Thanks to Frito for the help with the idea for this. ;)
Zoe frowned at the closet attached to the kitchen. She had been sent in search of Wash who had up and disappeared a few hours ago. Considering it was night on the planet they had stopped to refuel at, there had been little doubt that he was still on board. But for some gorram reason they still hadn't been able to locate him and she had no idea why he was hiding.
Nudging the door open with her foot, gun out just in case, she sighed loudly at the sight of Wash blinking at her from inside the closet.
"Any reason," Zoe asked, slipping the gun back where it belonged, "that you're hiding in the supply closet?"
"Uh." Wash blinked again. "I was...inspecting...the...yeah, I was inspecting the contents to make sure we had everything we needed!"
It was obvious he had been there for a while since a few dinosaurs littered the ground along with a few water skins. Zoe crossed her arms and stared at him.
He gave her a small grin back and gestured to the other side of the closet. "Care to join me?"
Oh, now she really was going to shoot him. Just as her fingers touched the cool metal of the handle, another voice interrupted her thoughts.
"Oh good, ya found him!" Kaylee said, cackling as she raced through the door. She was a little flushed from searching the rest of the hold along with Mal but now she looked like she was up to something. And considering the girlish scream that erupted from the closet, that something was shaping up to be mighty entertaining.
"You keep away from me, you crazy mechanic!" Wash yelped, scrambling to get up and out as soon as humanly possible. He barely managed to duck under Kaylee's wild lunge, leg buckling slightly from not being used in a few hours. "Help, help! Killing! Blood! PAIN! LOTS OF PAIN!"
Zoe had absolutely no clue as to what was going on but curiosity prompted her to follow the pair as Wash ran screaming towards the hold, Kaylee and her laughter following close behind. She was joined on the stairwell by Mal who was staring at the sight before him.
"What in the gorram 'verse is going on?" he asked, obviously torn between laughter and yelling.
"Oh, just a dose of fung-kwong duh jeh from the looks of it, sir," Zoe responded, leaning against the railing to peer down.
On the stairs below them Kaylee pounced again and the older woman was suddenly surprised at how fast that girl really was. Wash, either having slowed down due to his numbed legs or from a desire not to see Kaylee miss and bounce down the stairs, got nailed square on and they both went down in a heap of limbs, girlish shrieking and flailing from Wash and a loud war whoop from the mechanic.
"GOT YA!" she crowed, sitting up on his chest as she...
Zoe and Mal squinted.
"Did she just put what I think she just put on his face?"
"I believe so," Zoe said, laughter on the outskirts of her words.
Wash's hands flew up to his face. "You didn't...!"
"I did!"
"Get it off!"
Kaylee beamed. "Why sure, if you say so," she said sweetly and reached forward before being dumped off to the side as he jumped to his feet.
"Not like that," he muttered, words muffled by his hands. "Get it off without ripping it off!"
"Can't do that, don't work like that. It rips the hairs right out. Right nice if the gravity goes wonky when a girl's trying to shave."
Mal choked. "She didn't..."
"She did."
"You're the one who told me I couldn't catch you to do it," Kaylee warned, sitting up and rubbing her back from where she had fallen.
"But...but...my mustache!"
She giggled.
"I'll show you," Wash muttered, turning and stomping up the stairs. "No one messes with a Washburn mustache! It's a point of pride! I'll get this gorram thing off and it'll be just fine!"
Zoe and Mal had the good grace to wait until he was almost out of earshot before doubling over with laughter.
~~~
Kaylee peered at Wash in the pilot's chair with a grin. Everything appeared to be normal...except for the piece of waxing paper still stuck to his mustache--where it had been for three days now. "You know, the longer it's on, the worse it'll be getting it off."
The only answer she got was a petulant glare and a grunt.
"Ain't my fault, you're the one who dared--dared!—me to do it," she said, sticking out her tongue as she settled against the panels. A glance over his head showed her that things were going to plan. "You look silly."
"Oh and I wonder why," Wash said, reaching over to poke her in the ribs. He sniffed with as much dignity as he could gather together. "It'll come off eventually. The wax...stuff will eventually dry up and die."
"Well, yeah, but that may take a month or longer, especially on board a ship."
Wash went to retort right as a pair of slender arms snuck around the back of the chair. He had time to blink, just once, before he felt one hand quickly settle on his shoulder with an incredibly firm—not quite painful--grip as the other went..."HEY!"
Riiiip.
It was a damned good thing they weren't actually _flying_ anywhere as he howled, hands clamping over where his mustache had been a few seconds ago. "Ching-wah tsao duh liou mahng!" he howled, obviously in some pain as he jumped up and danced around the cabin. Stopping, still half-bent over, he stared at Zoe and Kaylee, who were leaning on each since they obviously couldn't stop laughing.
"I hate all of you."
Grinning, Kaylee reached over to tug down his hands and glanced up at Zoe. "See? I told you."
"Hrm." Tilting her head to the side, she nodded. "I guess you were right. Well, I'll be." Handing Wash the waxing paper, she patted him on the cheek before heading out.
"...what was that all about?"
"Oh, nothing, nothing at all." She leaned over again and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. "Sorry for the pain but it had to be done. And I'll be bettin' that you'll be thankin' me soon enough." Humming, she spun around and ducked out the door as Mal came in, staring over his shoulder.
"What's gotten into--hey, you took it off!"
"Shut. Up."
fung-kwong duh jeh: self indulgent lunacy
Ching-wah tsao duh liou mahng from humping son of a bitch
Fandom: Firefly
Characters: Wash, Kaylee, Mal, Zoe
Prompt: 003 - Ends
Word Count: 1,109
Rating: PG-13 for swearing explanations
Author's Notes: So...what ever happened to Wash's mustache?
Thanks to Frito for the help with the idea for this. ;)
Zoe frowned at the closet attached to the kitchen. She had been sent in search of Wash who had up and disappeared a few hours ago. Considering it was night on the planet they had stopped to refuel at, there had been little doubt that he was still on board. But for some gorram reason they still hadn't been able to locate him and she had no idea why he was hiding.
Nudging the door open with her foot, gun out just in case, she sighed loudly at the sight of Wash blinking at her from inside the closet.
"Any reason," Zoe asked, slipping the gun back where it belonged, "that you're hiding in the supply closet?"
"Uh." Wash blinked again. "I was...inspecting...the...yeah, I was inspecting the contents to make sure we had everything we needed!"
It was obvious he had been there for a while since a few dinosaurs littered the ground along with a few water skins. Zoe crossed her arms and stared at him.
He gave her a small grin back and gestured to the other side of the closet. "Care to join me?"
Oh, now she really was going to shoot him. Just as her fingers touched the cool metal of the handle, another voice interrupted her thoughts.
"Oh good, ya found him!" Kaylee said, cackling as she raced through the door. She was a little flushed from searching the rest of the hold along with Mal but now she looked like she was up to something. And considering the girlish scream that erupted from the closet, that something was shaping up to be mighty entertaining.
"You keep away from me, you crazy mechanic!" Wash yelped, scrambling to get up and out as soon as humanly possible. He barely managed to duck under Kaylee's wild lunge, leg buckling slightly from not being used in a few hours. "Help, help! Killing! Blood! PAIN! LOTS OF PAIN!"
Zoe had absolutely no clue as to what was going on but curiosity prompted her to follow the pair as Wash ran screaming towards the hold, Kaylee and her laughter following close behind. She was joined on the stairwell by Mal who was staring at the sight before him.
"What in the gorram 'verse is going on?" he asked, obviously torn between laughter and yelling.
"Oh, just a dose of fung-kwong duh jeh from the looks of it, sir," Zoe responded, leaning against the railing to peer down.
On the stairs below them Kaylee pounced again and the older woman was suddenly surprised at how fast that girl really was. Wash, either having slowed down due to his numbed legs or from a desire not to see Kaylee miss and bounce down the stairs, got nailed square on and they both went down in a heap of limbs, girlish shrieking and flailing from Wash and a loud war whoop from the mechanic.
"GOT YA!" she crowed, sitting up on his chest as she...
Zoe and Mal squinted.
"Did she just put what I think she just put on his face?"
"I believe so," Zoe said, laughter on the outskirts of her words.
Wash's hands flew up to his face. "You didn't...!"
"I did!"
"Get it off!"
Kaylee beamed. "Why sure, if you say so," she said sweetly and reached forward before being dumped off to the side as he jumped to his feet.
"Not like that," he muttered, words muffled by his hands. "Get it off without ripping it off!"
"Can't do that, don't work like that. It rips the hairs right out. Right nice if the gravity goes wonky when a girl's trying to shave."
Mal choked. "She didn't..."
"She did."
"You're the one who told me I couldn't catch you to do it," Kaylee warned, sitting up and rubbing her back from where she had fallen.
"But...but...my mustache!"
She giggled.
"I'll show you," Wash muttered, turning and stomping up the stairs. "No one messes with a Washburn mustache! It's a point of pride! I'll get this gorram thing off and it'll be just fine!"
Zoe and Mal had the good grace to wait until he was almost out of earshot before doubling over with laughter.
~~~
Kaylee peered at Wash in the pilot's chair with a grin. Everything appeared to be normal...except for the piece of waxing paper still stuck to his mustache--where it had been for three days now. "You know, the longer it's on, the worse it'll be getting it off."
The only answer she got was a petulant glare and a grunt.
"Ain't my fault, you're the one who dared--dared!—me to do it," she said, sticking out her tongue as she settled against the panels. A glance over his head showed her that things were going to plan. "You look silly."
"Oh and I wonder why," Wash said, reaching over to poke her in the ribs. He sniffed with as much dignity as he could gather together. "It'll come off eventually. The wax...stuff will eventually dry up and die."
"Well, yeah, but that may take a month or longer, especially on board a ship."
Wash went to retort right as a pair of slender arms snuck around the back of the chair. He had time to blink, just once, before he felt one hand quickly settle on his shoulder with an incredibly firm—not quite painful--grip as the other went..."HEY!"
Riiiip.
It was a damned good thing they weren't actually _flying_ anywhere as he howled, hands clamping over where his mustache had been a few seconds ago. "Ching-wah tsao duh liou mahng!" he howled, obviously in some pain as he jumped up and danced around the cabin. Stopping, still half-bent over, he stared at Zoe and Kaylee, who were leaning on each since they obviously couldn't stop laughing.
"I hate all of you."
Grinning, Kaylee reached over to tug down his hands and glanced up at Zoe. "See? I told you."
"Hrm." Tilting her head to the side, she nodded. "I guess you were right. Well, I'll be." Handing Wash the waxing paper, she patted him on the cheek before heading out.
"...what was that all about?"
"Oh, nothing, nothing at all." She leaned over again and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. "Sorry for the pain but it had to be done. And I'll be bettin' that you'll be thankin' me soon enough." Humming, she spun around and ducked out the door as Mal came in, staring over his shoulder.
"What's gotten into--hey, you took it off!"
"Shut. Up."
fung-kwong duh jeh: self indulgent lunacy
Ching-wah tsao duh liou mahng from humping son of a bitch