The date

Feb. 16th, 2013 09:50 am
indiana_j: (Default)

At least I looked pretty? Wasn't bad, just awkward and a little boring.

Still trying to decide if the problem was him (who should have been my type, look and personality) or me. -.-

I don't know - won't be surprised if I don't hear from him again and not too horribly upset if that comes true. Trying to not let my subconscious take this as a sign that I'm not dating material and just say it was a practice date.

At least I got to enjoy Buzz before hand, tons if compliments at work and then got a free dinner?

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Ow my brain

Feb. 9th, 2013 10:13 am
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I hate when the almost perfect sleep (I only woke up twice instead of four or five times) is marred by headaches that I can only describe as heavy. Makes you feel as if you're brittle and one wrong move will just break you.

Some medication, a shower (which both hurt and felt good) and some breakfast helped. Maybe the cause was the fact that I hadn't eaten in almost 24 hours?

To be honest, I'm having more headaches lately and I probably need to get that checked out.

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Today has been very emotionally charged. Amanda and Marissa provided wonderful distraction this morning.

And then I had to pick up Sadie and throw her bodily into the car while visiting Heather at the cemetery as two very aggressive dogs came tearing across the ground at us. I don't have words but stark terror apparently grants me super speed and strength, who knew?

Stark. Terror. That was my sign to have my big cry if the day.

Now, numb and exhausted. Watched tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy finally and am finishing up The Men Who Built America. And I think it's time for wine.

God, I miss her.

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Les Mis

Jan. 16th, 2013 11:12 pm
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Just emotions or why I really should have used the bathroom during 'Empty Chairs and Empty Tables'. No spoilers, save that for tomorrow.

Brief, emotional reaction  )

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One of me! Just finished hair and make up for dad's retirement party in DC.

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Yes. My background on my work monitor is that of Grumpy Cat with a birthday hat. Isn't yours?

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There was this thing I read - a guy took a video a day, a second long. I like the idea but prefer picture a day. Don't know if I'll post every day but here's the first one.

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Sometimes

Jan. 3rd, 2013 10:11 pm
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all it takes is a thought and it comes tumbling down )

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Marissa posted a picture of the two of us and my first thought was 'okay, a little heavier looking picture but I look happy'. I'll take it.

I am Chef extraordinaire and I have amazing friends, those present and those not.

I remembered what joy felt like, if only for a while.

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So we leave tomorrow and I've got a shit ton of things to do today:

- laundry
- clean as relatives are coming over the day after we get back
- meal plan for the Reunion of Roommates (I know I'm making Greek yogurt cheesecake with pomegranate sauce but that's all I've got do far)
- go into town to pick up various odds and ends
- wrap gifts
- pack everything tonight
- do a bit of work
- visit The cemetery






And, you know rest and recover from this infection. I'd really like to be completely done before tomorrow as we have to take the dog to the boarding place and then start a 3+ hour drive.

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Home sick now after getting sick at work. I've got a viral sinus infection. FML. I've got meds and I'm going to take a nap and them work from home.

Uuuuugh.

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I'm at Busboys and Poets, being given free wine samples by the bartender and my waiter, as I wait for Marissa. I _think_ I'm done my shopping and I'm just trying to ... Put on my game / brave face for the holiday?

Free wine samples. 'Nuff said.

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So, it's been a rough day (more about that later) but at least I think I'm rocking the outfit today?

Love the belts these days )


Ugh, my hair, though...

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When did Ruby Tuesday get free wifi? And a menu with 12 different 'fit' items that look good and list calories to allow for a smart lunch? And have light ranch dressing that didn't taste like death?

*twilight zone*

Out and about on a day off. I hit up Fashion Bug and came out with a sweater, two shirts, pair of jeans, sweat pants, sneakers, two coffee mugs and socks for under a hundred. \o/. Saved about $140.

Having lunch, running a few errands and then home to play video games, email and write.

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A small piece on grief and the 'curse of the strong'. Spoilers for not this last episode of OUaT but the one prior to that.



This was the curse of the strong )



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Will update more later but right now I've left work early, am having lunch in Wegmans and remembering to breathe.

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Hungry...

Oct. 18th, 2012 11:26 am
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I have a full physical today, so I have to fast. It's amazing how hungry you get when you aren't allowed to eat.

And the water's not cutting it.

But the physical has to happen - I'm really bad about making appointments and after everything that's happened, I owe it to myself and my parents. Doubt there's anything wrong but that's why people go through these - to make sure they're right.

Damn, I'm hungry ...

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Happy Birthday 'letter' )

Ugh

Sep. 24th, 2012 03:47 am
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Insomnia sucks.

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I hit a pretty bad patch these past few days - that week off, staycation that looked so great five weeks ago seemed to be a horrible idea when practiced. Monday and Tuesday, I just skulked around the house (the Sears guy came to fix the stove; *sigh* he ordered the wrong part and he'll have to come back next week), playing Dragon Age II and watching long stretches of nothing - i.e., thank you TV for having hours long marathons of shows I can put on in the background. I just felt kind of miserable by the time I went to bed last night (it didn't help that Sadie barked from her crate from 8 am until 10 that morning, when I finally got fed up and got out of bed).

I woke up to no barking, thanks to my dad shutting their door and mine before leaving, and when I checked the weather report, I saw it was going to be 84 degrees today. That decided me - I was up and out of the house by 10 am. I went and visited Heather's graveside for a bit and then headed to the pick your own orchid that's about 15 minutes past that; it's actually owned by the same folks who own the graveyard. Sadly, their peach season had ended about a week or two ago but I picked a bag full of apples and bought some cheese.

My next thought was to go to Pearmund Winery but decided that was a bad, bad idea on a completely empty stomach. I hit up Claire's at the Depot for lunch (shrimp and gouda grits in an andouille sausage and lobster cream sauce and the berry crumble with vanilla gelato) and realized that if I tried to do Pearmund, I'd be putting too much in one day. And that I could always go on Friday. I decided to alter the plan and went to Peeple's to pick up a few shirts and some shoes. Really, I needed to find a new pair of black flats replace the ones I've worn to almost nothing but also needed to get a pair of shoes to wear to a friend's (thankfully) casual wedding on Sunday morning. I got both; they were having a BOGO 1/2 off sale and I had a 20% off coupon, so that was nice.

Generally, I feel like I'm just going through the motions but I'm hoping that by making myself actually go through those motions, I'll get to a point where it's not just something that I'm doing without caring/thinking but I'm doing because I'm enjoying them. I will say that getting out, getting into the sun, and doing things today did help. I know I'm depressed right now but I have to take things a day at a time and acknowledge when I need to do something or when sitting at home is what I need. Boxing myself up when I need to be out will only make myself feel worse.

Now to nap and respond to email...

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